At any rate, this extremely personal moment is a whopping combination of nerves, joy, anxiety, expectation and a catalogue of other feelings for all parties involved, so where do you start?
Perhaps my favourite proposal story is where a couple had been together for years, and multiple trips to Paris and other romantic cities around the world later, still no ring. One evening when they were brushing their teeth in the bathroom at home the girl caved and asked him what was going on, at which point he blurted out that he had been trying to propose for ages but kept getting too nervous and fluffing it. So at that moment, toothbrush in mouth, he got down on one knee and asked her to marry him.
As it happens, it’s one of the best stories ever, and actually beautifully romantic. So the moral of the story is probably that the most important thing is to simply ask the question – those four little words in themselves are quite enough to make the moment magic… even when they’re uttered through a mouthful of toothpaste.
That said, here are our tips for taking it up a notch when it comes to getting it right…
If your other half is a shy and retiring introvert, a Hollywood style proposal written across the big screen at a sports event, or a public declaration in front of all your friends probably isn’t the best idea. Hopefully, no one knows him/her quite as well as you do, so whatever you do, keep them in mind when you’re planning your big moment – sounds obvious but it’s worth pointing out.
I remember one guy saying to me once that even though, by the time you propose, you’re pretty confident what the answer is going to be, there’s that split second where you’re on one knee and you suddenly think ‘what if I have really misread this?’ Once again, chances are your partner is going to shriek ‘yes’ from the rooftops, but to try to limit your own anxiety, give yourself plenty of time so you’re not under any unnecessary pressure. After all, you want to enjoy the moment and then have time to luxuriate in it together.
That said, if you want to get something done, set a deadline, or perhaps more helpfully, a location. Whether you’re picking a beautiful hotel to visit for the weekend or going somewhere that means something to you both for a romantic walk, picking somewhere special to pop the question will add an extra layer of significance to the whole experience (as if it needs it), but also gives you a framework to work with, just in case nerves get the better of you.
Ask his/her friends for their thoughts on your intended plans and see if they’ve mentioned their dream scenario – they will be more than happy to make the moment magic for you both. Then, once you have an idea, don’t be afraid to get the pros involved. The teams at You and Your Wedding and Plan Your Perfect Wedding have some helpful advice and if you’re staying at a hotel, get the staff on board with your ideas so that they can help set the scene. Everyone loves a good ‘happily ever after’ and they will all be rooting for you!
Speeches sound their best when they appear to be off the cuff, but whether you’re going for a simple one liner or a lengthy monologue, winging it probably isn’t a great idea. So prepare what you want to say in advance, even if it’s more of a guide than a rehearsed speech. Not to make you more anxious, but one rather harsh critic who got a dreamy proposal on the beach from her husband commented: “it was about 75% right… he repeated himself quite a bit”… you heard the woman.
All that said, when it comes down to it, we’re sure your partner will love it whatever you do, so be simple, be classic, be classy and most of all, be you!… oh, and CONGRATULATIONS!
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