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What I learned from a silent retreat

Lead Product Designer, Jas, spent 10 days on a silent retreat, learning about herself, her wellbeing, and ultimately the meaning of spa.

We often get asked, 'what do you actually do on a spa break?', and while we can list the details including saunas, steam rooms, spa pools and spa treatments, what we generally mean when we ask that question is - ‘is it enough to do?’

The short answer is 'yes', but in reality it's about something a bit more nuanced than that. Part of the spa experience is about having the time and space to slow down. We all run around trying to win at life as if we're in it for an Olympic medal, and when we're faced with the time to stop - however much we want to - we often find it quite hard to simply 'be'.

The nurturing environment of a spa helps us to slow down and rest, in mind, body and soul. Taking that mindset to new heights, our Lead Product Designer, Jas, did a 10-day silent retreat and came away with a deeper understanding of self, wellbeing, and even what we get from the spa environment.

Deciding to go on a silent retreat

I have done a lot of wellness stuff over the last few years, and I was always curious about going on a silent retreat because the idea of switching off from everything and having a moment to myself was what I needed. I had quite a lot going on at home and I don't always get to simply disconnect from the noise and responsibilities that come with it.

However, life got in the way — finding the right time, the right place, and the right budget, all took longer than expected. As the saying goes, ‘everything happens for a reason’, so about two years ago, when two friends shared their experiences, it finally felt like the stars aligned and I decided to do it.

What is a silent retreat?

I attended a 10-day residential silent retreat based on what was recommended to me. The premise is that you face life’s challenges by practicing Noble silence, a Buddhist concept that means no talking, reading, writing, or digital distractions - just you and your thoughts. You are taught techniques in the guided sessions, so you can observe and harness your thoughts better. It's done gradually - you're not thrown in at the deep end. My friends hadn’t given me many details, which had its advantages as it’s important to remember that everyone's experience is different. The first day was about settling in and getting the agenda, and then it began.

The silence itself wasn’t too challenging for me, but sitting in silence to meditate for hours was. During meditation is really when your thoughts can run wild, and your body begins to complain because of the discomfort. The discipline is to be present, maintain stillness, observe thoughts all whilst being mindful that it’s temporary.

Breathing techniques are an essential part of meditation. Many of us shallow breathe because we’re stressed out all the time or not connecting with our breath at full capacity. The principle is that this traps emotions in our bodies, which can often lead to chronic pain. Learning proper breathing techniques is really gamechanging.

What I learned from my silent retreat

Ultimately, my silent retreat gave me a different perspective on my life’s challenges. As part of the teachings, you are reminded that as tempting as it is to point fingers, your reactions towards others are connected to your past experiences, related or unrelated to the situation or individual. This is where the discipline of being present and leaning into the discomfort allows you to reflect before reacting. Self-awareness helps exercise empathy.

This, amongst other teachings, resonated with me. After the silent retreat, I became more aware of how emotions manifest physically as the sensations in my body heightened during situations when I’ve felt unsafe, defensive, angry, or upset. Allowing me to navigate the encounters in a more positive way than I had done in the past.

We're so conditioned to react quickly when something happens that we’re not taught to stop and listen to what our bodies are telling us. Tuning into my body first has become a new empowering habit.

Spas as a gateway to inner silence

While most spas don’t offer silent retreats, which aren’t for everyone, I believe the process of going on a spa day or spa break is a great gateway to accessing that more meditative state. It provides a similar opportunity to slow down and reconnect, whether it’s for a few hours or a few days.

A lot of people ask what you do at a spa because there’s a sense that if you’re just sitting by the pool or lounging in a sauna then you're not doing anything, and we’re all so addicted to being busy all the time.

However, these things are not doing nothing. They’re essential to our wellbeing. In moments of quiet, or even silence, you have more clarity about what you're doing. A spa visit provides a gateway to mindfulness—giving yourself permission to pause, reflect, and simply be.

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